Friday, April 15, 2005

The Beating of the Toms

Despite the Party in Power's vaunted direct marketing prowess — and through no effort of my own — I am a card-carrying (well, card-holding) member of the National Republican Congressional Committee and Bush-Cheney '04. I've got the Charter Member of the Minnesota Campaign photo of W and Laura. I used to get regular phone invitations from Tom DeLay to join the president for dinner in Washington, but I just couldn't tear myself away from the Kerry phone bank.

Since the calls and letters come to the office, I have to assume it's my status as a businessowner that keeps them coming. How could I possibly pay big taxes and suffer under onerous regulation and be anywhere to the left of Arlen Specter?

Contrary to what it took to get on the lists, I gave it my best efforts to get kicked off. After ignoring four or five calls, I gave very explicit career advice to Tom DeLay through an NRCC telemarketer. After considering several appropriate responses to the direct mail appeals — a ton of bricks attached to the postage-paid reply envelope, for example — I sent a precious 9-11 dollar to cover my membership.


Then came the election and things quieted down. I thought I was free and clear.

Today, Stephanie called and went directly to voice mail. She was inviting me to Washington on behalf of the NRCC (or was it the Business Advisory Council?) and Rep. Tom... who? Tom Reynolds? Where's my buddy the Hammer? Could this be a sign DeLay is truly on the way down, if even the Republicans won't dangle him in front of the faithful?

As my wife says whenever I start raving, "I thought you were crossing the great divide."

So I'm calling back, and this time, I plan to be nice.

Stay tuned.


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